Lao Tzu, the ancient Chinese philosopher and writer, the author of the Tao Te Ching, said “Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.”

When I watched this video  and read Masaru Emoto’s book on his experiment with human consciousness and water as suggested by my teacher, it was a profound realization of how we impact ourselves with our non stop mind chattering without realizing the impact – good or bad. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oJmmkLm6aYA

The word FAIL – is the opposite of success.  Obviously Law of Duality at its work – it is nothing but two sides of the same coin. However, human minds are conditioned to understand and interpret the word FAIL as lacking or being deficient in something or not being able to obtain / achieve the desired outcome. Failing school grades, failed business, failed relationships, failed career – when things don’t happen as we desire them to, we label it as FAILURE.  Failure is associated with rejection, a sense of lack compared to “something” which is our idea of how it should be.  All that the word does is that it evokes a negative e-motion. If words are powerful, if words are energy, which they are , then it’s a no-brainer what the association of the word “FAIL” does to us.

But before we go deeper into our own mindsets, lets establish the chain.

We live in a world of duality. Good-bad, light-dark, life-death, success-failure, right-wrong, positive-negative are two sides of the same coin.  One can’t exist without the other.  At the end it is only a judgement, a qualification.  Our habit  of judging / labelling is what limits our experience of life. Our judgement clouds us from looking at facts just as facts – for the reality is that we never know the big picture. If you have read or heard this story before and need a reminder then here it is.

 “The Old Man and his Horse

Once there was an old man who lived in a tiny village. Although poor, he was envied by all, for he owned a beautiful white horse. Even the king coveted his treasure. A horse like this had never been seen before – such was its splendor, its majesty, its strength.

People offered fabulous prices for the steed, but the old man always refused. “This horse is not a horse to me,” he would tell them. “It is a person. How could you sell a person? He is a friend, not a possession. How could you sell a friend.” The man was poor and the temptation was great. But he never sold the horse.

One morning he found that the horse was not in his stable. All the village came to see him. “You old fool,” they scoffed, “we told you that someone would steal your horse. We warned you that you would be robbed. You are so poor. How could you ever protect such a valuable animal? It would have been better to have sold him. You could have gotten whatever price you wanted. No amount would have been too high. Now the horse is gone and you’ve been cursed with misfortune.”

The old man responded, “Don’t speak too quickly. Say only that the horse is not in the stable. That is all we know; the rest is judgment. If I’ve been cursed or not, how can you know? How can you judge?”

The people contested, “Don’t make us out to be fools! We may not be philosophers, but great philosophy is not needed. The simple fact that your horse is gone is a curse.”

The old man spoke again. “All I know is that the stable is empty, and the horse is gone. The rest I don’t know. Whether it be a curse or a blessing, I can’t say. All we can see is a fragment. Who can say what will come next?”

The people of the village laughed. They thought that the man was crazy. They had always thought he was a fool; if he wasn’t, he would have sold the horse and lived off the money. But instead, he was a poor woodcutter, and old man still cutting firewood and dragging it out of the forest and selling it. He lived hand to mouth in the misery of poverty. Now he had proven that he was, indeed, a fool.

After fifteen days, the horse returned. He hadn’t been stolen; he had run away into the forest. Not only had he returned, he had brought a dozen wild horses with him. Once again, the village people gathered around the woodcutter and spoke. “Old man, you were right and we were wrong. What we thought was a curse was a blessing. Please forgive us.”

The man responded, “Once again, you go too far. Say only that the horse is back. State only that a dozen horses returned with him, but don’t judge. How do you know if this is a blessing or not? You see only a fragment. Unless you know the whole story, how can you judge? You read only one page of a book. Can you judge the whole book? You read only one word of one phrase. Can you understand the entire phrase?”

“Life is so vast, yet you judge all of life with one page or one word. All you have is one fragment! Don’t say that this is a blessing. No one knows. I am content with what I know. I am not perturbed by what I don’t.”

“Maybe the old man is right,” they said to one another. So they said little. But down deep, they knew he was wrong. They knew it was a blessing. Twelve wild horses had returned. With a little work, the animals could be broken and trained and sold for much money.

The old man had a son, an only son. The young man began to break the wild horses. After a few days, he fell from one of the horses and broke both legs. Once again the villagers gathered around the old man and cast their judgments.

“You were right,” they said. “You proved you were right. The dozen horses were not a blessing. They were a curse. Your only son has broken both his legs, and now in your old age you have no one to help you. Now you are poorer than ever.”

The old man spoke again. “You people are obsessed with judging. Don’t go so far. Say only that my son broke his legs. Who knows if it is a blessing or a curse? No one knows. We only have a fragment. Life comes in fragments.”

It so happened that a few weeks later the country engaged in war against a neighbouring country. All the young men of the village were required to join the army. Only the son of the old man was excluded, because he was injured. Once again the people gathered around the old man, crying and screaming because their sons had been taken. There was little chance that they would return. The enemy was strong, and the war would be a losing struggle. They would never see their sons again.

“You were right, old man,” They wept. “God knows you were right. This proves it. Your son’s accident was a blessing. His legs may be broken, but at least he is with you. Our sons are gone forever.”

The old man spoke again. “It is impossible to talk with you. You always draw conclusions. No one knows. Say only this. Your sons had to go to war, and mine did not. No one knows if it is a blessing or a curse. No one is wise enough to know. Only God knows.”

What Soren Kierkegaard said is so apt  “Once you label me you negate me.” If we take the element of labelling / judgement out of the equation, then there is no FAILURE as such. All that remains is a FEEDBACK – which only helps either in continuing taking the actions in the same direction or it’s only a re-direction which mandates that we take a different action. FEEDBACKs are just like the GPS which guide us and help us get back on the route to our destination in case we go off the route.

It requires practicing a lot of love, compassion both towards self and the others to change our mindset from FAILURE to FEEDBACK.  It requires letting go of the attachment of the thought of labelling the event as a failure. Life gives us feedbacks all the time – if you don’t like the feedback, change your action, change your energy, change your destiny.  The internal dialogue has to change. The internal self talk has to change. For Einstein said, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”  We all have the ability to create beautiful crystals within and live an enriched life. So next time, when your mind labels something as a FAILURE, remember there is always a choice to look at it with a different lens – for its just a FEEDBACK.